i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
