Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
We need to rekindle our bromance
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize