the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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