Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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