so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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