OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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