I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
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