I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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