did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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