I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
