Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
