It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
