the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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