I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
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I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
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Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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