He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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