After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
