Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
If I die, sorry about rent.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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