Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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