hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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