she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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