hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
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