Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Randomize