it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
