I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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