Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
