sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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