she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
