I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
he shaved USA in his pubs
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
