so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize