hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
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