its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize