it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize