All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
There's even glitter on my cock...
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