Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Randomize
