I can't watch pbs sober anymore
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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