Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
