the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Randomize