OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
