It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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