Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
