Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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