not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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