Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
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