no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
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Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
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It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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