He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize