Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
