How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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