i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
