She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
