if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize